Back to Alex Sanchez and his book, The God Box.
I’m not going to give a point-by-point disagreement with his interpretation of scripture. If anyone is interested, I’ll delve into it. But that’s not really what this blog series is about. We are all free to either believe the Bible or not. We are free to interpret it the way we choose. I don’t feel a need to convert Mr. Sanchez to my way of interpreting scripture.
What I really want to do in this discussion is urge both sides in the argument to treat the other side with respect.
Mr. Sanchez’s kindest and most loving character, a very mature boy who is secure in his homosexual identity and who also identifies himself as a Christian, tells the Christian boy who is confused and struggling with his sexual identity to go on the Internet and look at porn sites and see which one turns him on—heterosexual porn or homosexual porn.
And I find myself frustrated at the way the author has misunderstood Christians.
Christians wouldn’t urge a boy to go on the Internet and look at porn to figure out which pictures excite him more. For so many reasons, we wouldn’t do that.
The Bible teaches that porn is sinful, for one thing. There is no way that looking at a picture of someone’s naked body and lusting after it is OK with God. Porn is a filthy industry making men rich off the misery of young women and children. It’s not something that Christians believe is tolerable or useful.
But mostly we wouldn’t tell anyone to look at porn because we don’t believe we determine what’s OK with God by discovering what excites us. The Bible teaches that stolen bread tastes sweet. There is in us a desire to do naughty things and get away with them. There is an excitement in danger, often. Many exciting activities are neutral in God’s sight—roller coaster rides, for instance. Other exciting things are evil in God’s sight—a lap dance at a strip joint or robbing a bank. So a mature Christian, as Alex’s character was supposed to be, wouldn’t tell a boy to decide what sexual practices he was going to engage in based on what kind of porn excited him. Christians believe they are to deny their flesh and take up their crosses. They are taught to turn their backs on much that feels good to them. For the Christian there is only one place to look for answers about what is OK with God. That’s in the Bible. So the question for the Christian in regards to which sexual practices he should indulge in is not, “What do you most lust after?” The question is, “Will you follow your lust or will you crucify your desires when they conflict with what God has told us in scripture?”
Men have all kinds of sexual preferences. I had a friend who could only get sexually excited by spanking boys. Is this rare? Not as rare as you might think. There are sites on the Internet devoted to spanking. Google “spanking porn” and you come up with 4,480,000 results. So we know there is an audience. No Christian would suggest that sexual practices that excite us are bound to be approved of by God.
It is within the realm of possibility that a boy who thought he was both homosexual and Christian would tell another boy to go to homosexual porn sites and see if he liked them. But to have a boy who supposedly is an expert on the Christian Bible, and who supposedly loves the God found in the Christian Bible, offer such advice is dismissive of true Christian belief.
Right about now, you may be thinking about those preachers who have been caught visiting prostitutes or having sex with boys, and you may be thinking that of course Christians visit porn sites. I won’t argue that. I think that Christians are often hypocritical. My point is not that a Christian would never visit a porn site. It’s that a Christian wouldn’t suggest that visiting porn sites is healthy and a good way to determine God’s will for your sex life.
Another place where Alex gets Christians wrong is in his suggestion that Christians are mean-spirited if they believe homosexual acts are sinful.
This is a shallow treatment. Many Christians are not mean-spirited even though they hold that homosexual behavior is sinful. Many Christians would happily welcome down-and-out homosexuals into their homes and feed them and clothe them. Surely some Christians are mean-spirited. But not all.
Making all the traditional Christians in the book mean-spirited is like writing a book where all homosexual men are pedophiles settling for adult homosexual relationships because they don’t want to land in jail. If I did that, I’d be lying about homosexuals. I know many homosexuals who are wonderful, warm, compassionate people who have no desire to have sex with children. Some homosexuals believe that children are sexual beings and that they should be allowed to make up their own minds about having sex with adult men—that’s where the NAMBLA people come in. But it would be wrong for me to suggest that all, or even most, homosexual men want to see sex with minors legalized.
Finally, the one homosexual man in the book who turned his back on homosexuality for the sake of obedience to Scripture, was painted as miserable. This too felt unbalanced to me, probably because I’ve known homosexuals who have married opposite-sex partners and been happy with their decisions.
So, yes, I want to see more homosexuals in books, and I want to see them portrayed fairly and not as caricatures. But I also want to see accurately portrayed Christians in books. I want to see books about all kinds of different people because I think that it is good for us to get to know people who aren’t just like us. I think we should exercise our brains and think about what we read. I want more discussions on books—hopefully we can speak with respect for one another and consider what the other guy is saying instead of thoughtlessly spewing venom.
Which leads me to my next post…the reaction Noel gave to a book by Laurel Snyder and the way others reacted to her reaction.
Great post. Spot on.
Thanks, Suzan. I appreciate the feedback on this topic.
Sally, you did a great job explaining your position.
I’m looking forward to the next post, too.
Rebecca LuElla Miller´s last [type] ..Enter With Care
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Hi Sally, I’m reading this post because I just finished reading THE GOD BOX and I was interested in your thoughts on the subject. I too ached for the two main characters, but I don’t necessarily agree with your thought that the author depicted all the traditional Christians as mean-spirited. I thought Angie was sensitively depicted as a loving, forgiving and deeply religious person, as was Abuelita. In fact, it seemed to me, that the majority of the characters (besides the obvious ones–the boys who attack and the girl who won’t eat lunch w/them) were portrayed as sincere Christian seekers of God’s will. So it’s interesting how we experienced that differently.
I think it’s important to discuss these books and I appreciate hearing your perspective as a deeply committed Christian. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to express my thoughts on the book!
Vicky Alvear Shecter´s last [type] ..Want the Real Dirt on Cleopatra Check This Out
Thanks, Vicky. I’m glad you read the book. And I’m also glad you commented. I am always interested (and usually shocked) to find out how others view Christianity and Christians. We are so blind to our own sins and don’t really see ourselves until we see ourselves through someone else’s eyes.
The thing about the characters you mention is that they were very nice, but neither one of them held to a traditional Christian view of homosexuality. Alex got several of the reactions to homosexuality in the Christian community correct, but I would have liked to have seen one Christian like my friend’s parents who loved their homosexual son and used to go to gay bars with him so they could meet his friends and spend time with him. They believed he was sinning in his choice of sexual partners and they never hid that fact. But that didn’t make them love him or his friends any less.
My son has never engaged in homosexual activity, but he’s engaged in many other sinful activities. I don’t say to him, “I love you and I know that losing your temper and yelling at me is not a sin because you were born with a hot temper.” I say, “I love you even though you sinned when you gave in to your propensity for losing your temper and yelled at me. You need to repent. I will love you whether you will repent or not.”
He knows I love him despite his sin. I know he loves me despite my sin. We are two sinners sharing a home and loving one another. If he were to take a homosexual partner I would still love him and I would still say he was a sinner who needed to repent.
I didn’t see that kind of Christian in the book and it felt off to me because almost all the Christians I know are that kind of Christian.